Big Girl, you are beautiful.

I want to be very clear about this: my blog title is Fat Girl vs. World.  I want to make it very clear that I am aware of how "fat"...

I want to be very clear about this: my blog title is Fat Girl vs. World.  I want to make it very clear that I am aware of how "fat" is used as a pejorative, as an insult, and as a way to make people feel less worthy of their bodies.  People over the years have tried to "own" the term "fat" by saying "phat" instead, or by labeling themselves as something other than fat -- BBW, Large & In Charge, or just plain Zaftig

I could go on and on about this (in a future post I probably will) but I just wanted to explain my blog title... In my mind I'm trying to (1) defend people who have weight issues as being something other than the stereotype of fat, lazy, unmotivated and unable and to do so, I have to take on the world at large (2) illustrate that most of us cannot address weight loss and our health in a vacuum, we must struggle to find ourselves in the real world and (3) explain that there's a difference between the mindfulness of an unhealthy fat person (as is my point of view) versus the mindfulness of a fit person.

Too often when someone tries to compliment me, I shrug it off or basically undermine the compliment with some comment about my fatness.  It has become almost a way of showing modesty.  When people used to complment a hundred of years ago, you'd hold a fan to your face, blush, or say "I do declare!" (or if you're Blanche Devereaux).  Somewhere along the line we (especially females) are taught this false modesty of when we are being complimented to point out our weaknesses. 

I'm going to work on that.  Even if I don't undermine the comment vocally, I'm going to stop doing it mentally.  So yeah, I might be a fat girl vs the world, but that's not the way I'll always be.


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6 comments

  1. I use the word fat openly and fiercely in my daily life. I will not let it be considered some sort of "N word". It's a descriptor. Fat, thin, tall, short, dark, pale, curly, straight, gay, spiritual, skeptic. It's just a descriptor of what my size is. And it doesn't define me entirely. Just how much space I take up. :D

    So, while I may playfully use terms like zaftig, plump, chunky, round, plus size, or BBW (and may use more euphemistic terms when talking to others so as not to hurt the more delicate of feeling), when I talk about myself, I'll say FAT, I'm FAT, big ass, big girl, Big Mama, huge, obese, morbidly obese.

    I will not shy away from the actual terms and words, because I find not using the words gives them more power. While I'm biracial and understand the caution regarding the N word, when we take away it's normal use so that we, sheesh, use N word instead of the actual word, we give it MORE power. So I think avoiding words is bad. Use them in normal conversation (not as pejoratives or insults) and defuse them, I say.

    I'm a FAT girl. I'm morbidly obese. I am big-assed and round-bellied. That's me.

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  2. Very well put!!!

    When you say "morbidly obese" is there a shudder that runs through your body? It's such a scary term.

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  3. I totally agree! If we should not be shying away from the use of these terms. We need to get real with them and ourselves, then make the changes necessary to not need to use them to describe us any longer!

    I don't shudder when I say morbidly obese, but I do hate the term. Such an ugly sounding word, and I am trying to find my beauty instead.

    Glad to meet you Fat Girl vs World, and i will visit you again :)

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  4. Whenever I said that i was "obese" -- there was this pang that ran through my body of "how did I do this to myself." to add the word "morbid" i think would have destroyed me.

    I think all the euphemisms for being fat really just mask the issue of health. "Big Beautiful Woman" sure--but you might be inches away from a heart attack. How is that beautiful?

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  5. Great post. Thank you so much for linking up to my blog hop. I love your blog: now I am off to read more!

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<3 Robby