The 2011 Lady Balls Award

In my mom's last letter to me, she wrote:
Keep in mind: Women are NOT the "weaker sex" in unable to cope with life. If you take apart the word FEMALE into two parts, you get "FE-" (the abbreviation for IRON) and "MALE". Hmmm...Interesting concept: It seems to me, that composition would make us pretty darn strong...not necessarily physically stronger than a male...but, able to deal with most of the things that come our way in life. Perhaps, it is a very special inner strength we possess.
That, combined with my love of saying "oh my balls" or "oh my lady balls," and the fact that the female reproductive organs almost looks like someone flexing, brings us to the Lady Balls Awards!  More specifically, three levels of Lady Balls Awards:

The Brass Ovaries Award is in recognition of a woman who has a certain amount of chutzpah, swagger, or bravery.  When she walks, you hear her ovaries ring out with a certain "I am woman, hear me roar."

The winner of the Brass Ovaries Award says what is on her mind, stands behind what she says, and is unafraid of defending her positions.

The Iron Ovaries Award is in recognition of a woman who makes a man's testes want to hide because she is the epitome of strength, endurance, grit, and fearlessness.

The winner of the Iron Ovaries Award inspires others by taking on challenges with a courageous heart.  Her strength of character carries her through the day.  She might not always finish strong, but she always finishes.

The Steel Ovaries Award is in recognition of the most exceptional woman among women.  She enriches all womanhood just by showing up.  She exhibits aspects of both Brass and Iron Ovaries. 

The winner of the Steel Ovaries Award is a leader among women.  She is proud to be a woman, and proud to be stronger than most men she knows.  She has seen adversity and risen above.  She endures.

Please submit all nominations by October 31st.  
Voting on semi-finalists will begin on November 1, 2011. 
The THREE winners will be announced November 14, 2011!


Thank you -- this is 100% silliness, eh?


I won the copper ovaries award last year, and it got me a free sample of POM, so I hope I am nominated this year!


Though the presence of testicles might disqualify you -- I'll leave that up to the nominating/voting process :P


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